I need to clone five of me.
A year ago today I filed for divorce. I was looking at my instagram today and all my posts were drink related from those days. What a mess I was. I shake my head in disbelief but its only because I am not in that place or that person in pain anymore. GLOREH.
Ticket booked for Paris today and a hopper flight to Seville. Things are in motion!! agghh!
Why do I not feel that I deserve this life? How much of it is my decision and how much of it is chance and or even ordained? I’m so terrified to make a decision that I will regret and loathe the rest of my life.
If I don’t follow through on this crazy venture it will be the case.
Loaves and fishes, loaves and fishes. Grateful beyond words. I need reminders of things bigger than myself. I find that in nature. In the trees, sunshine, the air and waves of the ocean.
I started carrying my camera around with me all the time wherever I go. I need to allow myself to enjoy capturing things as I see them. And I need to be prepared and act like the photographer that I am.
I’m sitting here overwhelmed with the insane amount of work and personal preparations that need to be done. Always down to the wire for me. I should be at my office editing but I don’t like being there so late. I don’t feel safe and it’s creepy. I’m forcing myself to write. But I’m tired. I just want to sleep.
Motivated to kill it tomorrow.
Vamos!
