Arriving back in Paris and walking up the stairs to the apartment I first arrived to 5 weeks ago created a weird cloud of emotions over me the last two days. Perhaps I reflect too much on comparing this time to that. It was odd to think of when I first arrived and all the emotions I was experiencing and to now walk around with the knowledge and memories that I now carry. All good and yet bittersweet since my time is beginning to wrap up here.
My body is quite angry with my after the last few weeks of traveling, drinking and just go go go. I stayed in bed most of yesterday and drank lots of water. I resisted drinking any wine at poetry night and ate lots of veggies at dinner. I have totally gained weight here and I sorely miss my running shoes. I have almost bought some a few times, but I literally don’t have the room in my suitcase. Its a good thing every building has 6 flights of stairs and that I walk everywhere!
My new friend Betsy gave me a hug last night that made me miss my girlfriends something fierce. I skyped with a few and found the tears couldn’t stop. Thinking of going back to the U.S. and all the decisions there to be made followed and I’m so overwhelmed by the thought of it. My brain swirls with “SF NY or Paris?” I don’t know which one is the right one to choose. As if one would be easier than the other. I think not. So I ask myself what do I want?? and I don’t know. How hard is my life that I have those as my options. :sigh:
